Work It Like A Mum
Work It Like A Mum
Life Well Lived, Career Well Chosen: What If It All Starts with Self-Awareness?
This week on Work It Like a Mum, I’m joined by the brilliant Laura Nesbitt—career coach, mum, and expert in helping people figure out what they actually want before jumping into job boards.
We dive into the real reasons so many women feel stuck in their careers—and why the answer isn’t always a new job.
💡 We talk about:
- Why updating your CV is the last thing you should do
- How to get crystal clear on what lights you up (and what doesn’t)
- The power of designing your career around your life, not the other way around
- What burnout really looks like—and how to stop blaming the wrong things
- Laura’s lightbulb moment that changed everything (and how you can have one too)
✨ Key Takeaways:
- Start with who you are now, not who you were years ago.
- Your career should fit your life—not fight against it.
- Feeling stuck? It might be your lifestyle, not your job.
- Self-awareness is your superpower—use it before you start job hunting.
- Clarity = confidence = better career decisions.
🎧 Tune in now for an honest, uplifting, and practical chat that might just change how you think about work forever.
Show Links:
Connect with our host, Elizabeth Willetts here
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Hey, I'm Elizabeth Willits and I'm obsessed with helping as many women as possible achieve their boldest dreams after kids and helping you to navigate this messy and magical season of life. I'm a working mum with over 17 years of recruitment experience and I'm the founder of the Investing in Women job board and community. In this show, I'm honoured to be chatting with remarkable women redefining our working world across all areas of business. They'll share their secrets on how they've achieved extraordinary success after children, set boundaries and balance, the challenges they've faced and how they've overcome them to define their own versions of success. Shy away from the real talk? No way. Money struggles, growth, loss, boundaries and balance we cover it all. Think of this as coffee with your mates, mixed with an inspiring TED Talk sprinkled with the career advice you wish you'd really had at school. So grab a cup of coffee or a glass of wine, make sure you're cosy and get ready to get inspired and chase your boldest dreams, or just survive Mondays. This is the Work it Like A Mum podcast. This episode is brought to you by Investing in Women. Investing in Women is a job board and recruitment agency helping you find your dream part-time or flexible job with the UK's most family-friendly and forward-thinking employers. Their site can help you find a professional and rewarding job that works for you. They're proud to partner with the UK's most family-friendly employers across a range of professional industries. Ready to find your perfect job? Search their website at investinginwomencouk to find your next part-time or flexible job opportunity. Now back to the show.
Speaker 1:Hello and welcome to this week's episode of the Work it Like A Mum podcast. Today I am chatting with Laura Nesbitt, and Laura Nesbitt is a coach and helps people change their career, and we're going to be talking today all about the importance of self-awareness because, as Laura said before, people you know should even touch their CVs. She really goes in deep with them into what life they wanted to lead, what their values, priorities and working preferences are, how to discover their natural strengths, develop skills and the value that they bring to a team, their interests, passions and the causes they care deeply about and, of course, their career wish list, in the hope that then people finally get the career that you know is going to leave them fulfilled with a sense of purpose and feeling happy, um, for the rest of their life. So thank you so much, laura, for joining me thank you so much for inviting me no, thank you for coming.
Speaker 1:So before I guess we talk, we dive into self-awareness. It'd be really interesting to know sort of what brought you into coaching, in particular into this area of coaching yeah, I feel it was really by chance that I discovered coaching.
Speaker 2:Um, I've been working in events for like 18 months or so, really loving it, and then I met this guy, um, who is now my husband, and the thought of going away on site, to being away over a weekend, suddenly didn't appeal and I also was starting to feel a little bit frustrated in the role in terms of lack of development. So I remember I left that role with nothing to go to but a couple of weeks later took a 12 month kind of fixed term contract working in the learning and development team of a really large clinical research organisation. I thought I'll take this while I figure things out. Anyway, 11 years later, I was still still there. So in the beginning, when I first started there, I was responsible for coordinating all the management development curriculum for the first line and the middle line managers, so putting on courses in the offices around Europe, making sure they were getting the training that they needed. But in addition to that, I was also supporting my manager and my colleagues with delivering some management development webinars. They were quite new back then. This is like 2007, 2008 and one of the topics I used to sort of help support on was about coaching, and I hadn't heard about coaching before that. But we were positioning this webinar as a tool for managers to use with their direct reports to help them really solve their own problems, really overcome their own challenges, and using it as a development tool to support their ongoing career development. It just seemed to really capture my interest and I was just really keen to learn more.
Speaker 2:So a few years later, I remember thinking a little bit more about my career and where was I going? What direction did I wanted to take? You know, I was quite young when I first started there and initially it was it was just money for the weekend and going out and holidays and clothes. And then, as I started to approach my 30s, I started to think, no, I want to feel like I'm on a career ladder, I want to feel like I'm going somewhere, that I'm developing, that I'm growing and, you know, improving my skills. So I ended up enrolling on a CIPD course in learning and development practice and one of the modules in that was about coaching. So again, I really enjoyed that module. I was like this I think this could be something, I think this could be something here. So fast forward.
Speaker 2:A little while later I ended up moving around different departments within the organization I was working at and one of those teams was performance management. So we were the team that used to get you to fill in your year-end reviews. If you've ever been in the corporate yeah, I've been in that yeah you will know that that's that process. So we used to send out those forms to do your year-end review. But also encouraging employees to think about their longer-term career development and their career aspirations, as well as encouraging the managers to spend time with their direct ports having these conversations.
Speaker 2:So again that topic of coaching and using that as a tool for these discussions came up and I'd get involved in a few discussions and you know, do a little bit of coaching with employees and I was like no, I think this is something. There's some, definitely something here. So I remember really clearly I saw this free introduction to coaching a two day event in London and asking my manager if I could go along to it because they were going to give this introduction. You can learn a bit more about the diploma that you could go on with this company and I wanted to see if it'd be a really good fit for the role that I was doing and I wanted to see if it'd be a really good fit for the role that I was doing.
Speaker 2:So I remember attending that event like I say, thinking purely about the career I was in, but the training was delivered by a lot of coaches who were self-employed, you know, working for themselves. So naturally questions came up about how they work, what they earn, what you know their work-life balance is like and something just clicked. I was like, actually I want to do what they're doing. I want to have that freedom to work for myself and that flexibility to work when I want to work, rather than necessarily doing that nine to five.
Speaker 2:And I wasn't married at the time. We were engaged, I was planning the wedding and so we didn't have children at the time either. But I knew that if was planning the wedding, so we didn't have children at the time either. But I knew that if I ever did have children one day, I would really love to have that flexible working lifestyle to be around for them, especially when they were, when they're little. Yes, take them to school, pick them up, be present at assemblies and sports days and the other events at the school lay on, you know, be able to attend those things that was sort of already in my mind, even though I do know what you mean.
Speaker 1:I was saying you're having them, yeah, yeah, you feel like you kind of need to lay the foundation for that life, sometimes before you even have the kids, don't you?
Speaker 2:and sort of getting ready for them. I think if I haven't attended that event, I don't know if I you wouldn to have that light bulb moment. I might not have had that light bulb moment when I had it. It was, yeah, definitely hearing those, those coaches talking about their experience. It was like, oh, I want to do that, I want to do that it's nice that your employer does sound like they were supportive um, yes, so I did end up enrolling on the diploma.
Speaker 2:Oh, through your employer actually not through my employer, if I'm honest with you, um, I think it wasn't that they weren't supportive, it was all came down to the cost. I think really, um, looking back, so I self-funded in the end and put myself through it, which actually, in hindsight, was a really good decision yeah, and then when did you sort of go all in then into coaching?
Speaker 2:um, let's see I have put. Coaching has been I've sort of kept my hand in since having my children, but it's very much been more like a little hobby that I was doing. Um, I've had a few paying clients while while my children were, you know, really small. Um, it's more so now that my son is at nursery three days a week that, um, I feel like I've got that headspace, yeah, and the time to really go all in. You know, take it from being a hobby more to actually this is a, this is a business, this is a career choice now, um, and what sort of coaching, then, do you specialize in?
Speaker 2:we're going to be talking about self-awareness today, but what yeah, well, given the my past experience in performance management, I feel like that was also a nice light bulb moment. When I got moved into that team I discovered, you know, I really actually enjoy talking to people about their careers and where they're going, what they're good at, what they like might not necessarily like about their role. You know what they need to sort of feel that their strengths can really turn up. I really enjoy having all those conversations and helping people learn that about themselves. So I have sort of played around with my niche, particularly when I was in training. We were encouraged to do so and I kept coming back to career coaching every time I had a practice client with a career goal. I just felt it just felt more like a natural fit. It just it energized me more than perhaps talking about I don't know relationships or finance coaching. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:So so we're going to talk about self-awareness today and I think that you've sort of said on this question, your questionnaire, that you see people beginning their career change, updating their CV or scrolling through job boards and but you think the most natural place to start and the most powerful place to start is to pause and go deeper. And why do you think people don't put? Why do you think people like just jump you know feet first into the job boards and their CV?
Speaker 2:I actually think that sometimes feels like the best place to start. I think also, if you're quite unhappy where you are, you probably just want to jump ship and get out of there as soon as you can, and I totally understand that. That definitely was me. Um, like I just said, when I was in that events job, something happened. I was unhappy and I just left, and I'm not sure if I repeat that again now or something again in a different situation, but I think it just where you are, when you are unhappy, you feel like you just want to get out of that situation as quickly as you can. So you immediately turn to your CV let's update that. Turn to the job boards. Let's see what's out there.
Speaker 2:But I do think a really powerful place to start is just by taking that initial pause and just taking a moment to just reflect on who am I now?
Speaker 2:Um, because if it was me going for a new role now, I haven't had an interview really since 2007, a long time ago. I'm a very different person to who I was when I started my last job. I was 25 back then and a lot of things have shifted and changed, a lot of things that were important to me back then as a 25-year-old, not so important now and other things have taken their place. So I think it's just a really I think it's good to take a moment pause, take that step back and have a think about you know, who am I now? Who am I both personally and who am I professionally? Yeah, and one area I always encourage my clients to think about, amongst many other areas, is what life are you looking to create for yourself and what's the ideal lifestyle that you want, because your career really should support that. So this next role should move you closer to that lifestyle that you really want to create and not get in the way, not obstruct it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't think I do some career coaching, so I'm not a coach, just do it alongside the recruitment business. But I sometimes speak into clients and they come to me and they say they're unhappy with the job. But actually when you dive deeper, not everybody and some some jobs are bad, but I think sometimes I don't know if you found this it's not necessarily the job no, that's the problem.
Speaker 1:It's a lot of women. I don't know if you find this. I just nearly at burnout because they're taking on so much in life and everything like that. They're not delegating at work or at home and I think actually you could have the best job in the world, but if you're feeling so stretched 24 7, then you're. It's all quite natural to blame the job yeah, and also sometimes you're not unhappy.
Speaker 2:Yeah, in your current role, you just feel like something is changing within you your, it could, it's your priorities, it's your values. But maybe also you're just not quite the same person. What you used to just doesn't quite light you up in the way you used to. But perhaps new interests have come into your life and those are the ones that are worth exploring. There's so many different reasons why people change career. Um, and like I say it's, it's not just because you're unhappy, it's just something's different. And you sometimes have clients who can't quite put their finger on what's different they or what they want. They just know they don't want what they've currently got yeah.
Speaker 1:So how would you so what's the first step? So you, so you meet a client. They are not happy with their job, they potentially want to change. What would? How would you help someone sort of with that transition and, you know, I suppose, pinpoint what actually they do want to do?
Speaker 2:So I would typically start with the ideal life um, what's the life they want to create? Because I feel we all go to work to fulfill a certain lifestyle and I think it's really clear for them especially if they have been a role for a long time what. What does that lifestyle look like now, you know? Is it different to when you first started your role? Um, get really clear on what that is, um, and within that it's. I've got some questions here. Actually that might be quite interesting for anyone who's listening to this and finds this is resonating. Some questions such as ask yourself it's sort of you know, if everything could be exactly as you wanted it to be, what would be happening? So that's often, you know, one of the first questions I tend to ask someone what does a good day feel like in that ideal life? Um, you know, what would you like to stop doing in that ideal life?
Speaker 2:start doing, continue doing you know how do you want to spend your time, your energy and who do you want to be around, what um think about. You know the overall lifestyle that you're leading, your health, your relationships, your freedom. You know the activities that are bringing you joy. What are they, what they look like. You know how are you feeling in that ideal life, how are you behaving, how is it different to now and how are you showing up? And a really important one, a question um to ask, I feel, is is what memories, experiences or achievements do you want to look back on one day? You know, when you're let's put yourself in the future, at sort of 80 years old, and you're reflecting on your life one day, what are the things you want to be able to see? What are the memories you want to have, the experiences?
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:It's linked to that whole living without regret, isn't it? You know, looking back one day and and being I really lived my life. Well, I lived a really fulfilling life and I that's what I want. My clients start getting that, thinking about that now and working towards it what do you think stops people from getting their you know, ideal life?
Speaker 2:I think it very definitely varies between clients. A lot of the time it's having that space to think about it. The time and space to think about it. Self-reflection, to raise your awareness, can be one of those activities that we sometimes know we need to do but might put off. Sometimes it can feel a little bit uncomfortable. Stop thinking about certain topics. I've had that with clients. Um, others, absolutely, you know, dive in with two feet and love it. Others are a little bit more not too sure. I'm not quite sure. They don't quite see the connection. But what I'm trying to do here is paint a bigger picture. What's the overall like goal here, like life aspiration, and let's make sure your career is moving you towards that. But I think a lot of time it's time and also knowing what to ask yourself as well. A lot of one of the beautiful things about coaching is asking someone questions they wouldn't naturally think to ask themselves. Yeah, so you then encourage that deeper reflection yeah, it's very manifestation what you're talking about is there's?
Speaker 2:there's definitely links there. This is very much about you know, setting a strategy, if you like, for you're like where do I want to be, what's the outcome I'm aiming for? And then the career becomes, you know, one of the drivers of the strategy. Yeah, the drivers towards the outcome.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I like that. Yeah, oh, I did this manifestation workshop like a year and a bit ago and I went very skeptical. Well, it came out absolutely loving it and I was like I'm a convert. Yeah, I think.
Speaker 2:I'm very much on those. I'll you know, give everything a go and make my mind up there and rather than making that decision before I've tried it, yeah, but it was really good, really good, and you had to write a letter to your future self yes, yes, my, my friend who's a coach.
Speaker 2:She's coached me in the past. She is very big on manifestation and runs courses on it too, and I've attended some of her, her workshops, and it is really interesting if you just when you let your mind wander and think about the things that you'd like to bring into your life.
Speaker 1:I think that's the benefit of having a dog. I've got a dog, although he's a bit old now so he can't walk so far, but I think that actually walking the dog without the kids I'll have to say but you naturally then have that space in the fresh air, that time in the fresh air, and your mind can wander yeah, you can just sort of switch on that creative brain and let your mind.
Speaker 2:Yeah, just like daydreaming?
Speaker 1:it's not. I don't think you get it quite the same in driving, where you have to concentrate a bit.
Speaker 2:Obviously you have to concentrate on the road. You get your best ideas, don't you? When you're in the hour and you're on holiday.
Speaker 1:You're out for a walk away from the desk, away from the kids away from the laundry and the cook it when.
Speaker 2:I was in the office. Um, a group of us would regularly go for a walk at lunchtime for those exact reasons you know one to get away from the desk, but two, it just used to come back feeling so much more revived and ready for the second half of the day, which often included a lot of meetings, because we were a US company so a lot of meetings took place in the afternoon so it wasn't uncommon to be sat at your desk.
Speaker 2:You know back to back calls, yeah, so you really needed that walk yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:So you, you've manifested your ideal life, or you thought, daydreamed up your ideal life. And then what would be the next step in your um, you know, gaining self-awareness and clarity.
Speaker 2:So I've another reason for me starting with the ideal life, as I feel it's a really nice way to start uncovering some of your personal values and the priorities that are you've got going on within your life, rather than just asking someone what are your values. It can be quite a tricky question to answer straight away, whereas when you start getting someone to daydream about the life they really want to lead, these things will naturally come to the surface. And then I tend to dive in with my clients and going a little bit deeper on their values. You know what's most important to who they are today. Is it family, freedom, health, achievement, flexibility? There's a long, long list. And then, trying to go a little bit deeper with that, you know how would you rank those values in order of their importance? You know which ones are in your top five. How would you, you know, live your life in alignment with those values? What would need to be going on for you to feel that you are being true to those values?
Speaker 1:so these sorts of questions which, yeah again, they're not questions you naturally think to ask, do values change as you go through life, or does people tend to have the same values throughout their life?
Speaker 2:I think they're there, but they. The priority perhaps shifts yeah um, so mine, I. One of my core values is I've always been family and I would say that has probably come up now that I'm a parent, probably my first value now, perhaps where it may still be in the top five, but perhaps it may have been slightly lower down, I don't know. What would you say your values were?
Speaker 1:I always get stuck when people because I feel I'll be honest, I don't know how to determine what a value is really. I've spoken to a few coaches about it and some of them say, well, you know what winds you up, and then, yeah, I would show that's a value to you, um, but I think it's quite hard to say these are my values if you don't know how you know, about determining them yeah, I tend to use an exercise with my clients.
Speaker 2:It's like a little bit of pre-work that I give them before our first session together and there is a list there which I think really helps, and then just having the conversation together. And once someone gets talking and you dive a little bit deeper, like I say, those values start to come to the surface. You can start to hear sort of notice patterns in the things they're talking about, some themes emerging and again they give some clues to that person's values yeah what's most important to them so you've done your daydreaming, you've got your values.
Speaker 1:Then what would be next?
Speaker 2:I'm thinking about what's kind of important on a priority within those values. So, for example, if someone had family as a value, what would be the main priority within that value? So it might be something like we were talking about earlier taking the children to school in the morning. That might be a real priority for somebody being around to pick them up, or having a job where it's flexible if they're unwell, that sort of thing. Or being able to care for a parent, or something like that, doesn't you know, it could be working the other way. So it really is unique to the person, the individual. But I like to sort of get a sense of what are the priorities, what are the things you, you want to be doing, need to be doing?
Speaker 1:yeah, yeah. And then strength. I know we touched on strength, didn't we?
Speaker 2:before we hit record yeah, so I like to focus on um. I tend to dive into the personality first. Um, because this that's sort of everyone's personality will reveal some of their kind of core strengths, um. So I use a, um, a personality profiling tool called disc yeah um it was.
Speaker 2:We used to use this when I was in my learning and development role. We had some great feedback from it and I was introduced, reintroduced to it again when I was studying for the diploma. We were trained to use the tool and I went on to receive the accreditation as well because I could see the the value of using this with my clients, um. So it's a really nice, really easy sort of assessment to complete and then you get a nice breakdown of sort of the common traits to your personality. It's how you may, whether you're all sort of um, more people focused, more task focused, maybe more sort of introverted, more extroverted and of course most people are a real blend.
Speaker 2:But you'll have a sort of preference perhaps when you're working towards a particular profile, and it's really nice to kind of help someone uncover that because with that personality profiling you will learn things about kind of the task preferences associated with your profile. So are you someone who loves problem solving or creative work? Or do you feel more engaged when you're working with clear systems and processes, deeper work for fair working by yourself or being part of a team? It also uncovers information about your work environment. So are you someone who likes to be in that kind of busy office environment or a quiet space, working from home, perhaps even indoors, outdoors, you can learn all of this about yourself again. Might not be something you've naturally thought to consider before, and I think it's also a really useful tool for someone who perhaps is in the early stages of their career.
Speaker 1:I'm thinking I don't know why they don't get children to do this, like before GCSEs and picking GCSEs and A-levels. I think this is where the education system just there's this missing link, because so many people don't know they end up in the wrong career from the get-go.
Speaker 2:That was me. I drifted for years, absolute years, without really knowing what I wanted to do, and I do agree with you. I feel like you could have some kind of self-reflection classes. Yeah, you can learn a little bit more about yourself, because this is essentially like research on yourself. You're kind of gathering some information, some facts about yourself which you can then use to base decisions and make more informed choices.
Speaker 1:I think it would be such a good investment because people who end up in the right career at like 21 or whatever they're probably naturally going to go further in that career and probably earn more money and have a more fulfilling time.
Speaker 2:I use this with a client of mine. He was, I think he was probably about 19 20 at the time and it was really interesting because he was working at McDonald's at the time part-time job, wasn't quite sure what to do and this it really highlighted doing. Going through the personality, it really highlighted why he wasn't happy at McDonald's because he was more introverted. He was someone who preferred kind of systems and processes and working. He'd enjoy being part of a team but he liked the solo work as well and he luckily had a really kind of conscientious mindset. He had a great attention to detail and when we started sort of jumping in, he yeah, it was completely wrong environment because it's quite fast paced. You know you're part of the team yeah, you know, it's loud, it's busy um, so he enjoyed parts of it.
Speaker 2:It wasn't like it was awful for him. But to feel like he belonged somewhere, the environment needs to be quite different. I think that sense of belonging is really important. So now he's an accountant and it matches his personality preferences really well, as well as his behavioral strengths, which I'll come on to in a moment. It really plays to all of that love that yeah yeah.
Speaker 1:So I guess if you're listening to this, it's not necessarily just for you. It could be you. Yeah, you treat your children too.
Speaker 2:I know most of us have sort of learned what we like and don't like, what working environments work suit us and don't suit us, through our experience. But this would be a really nice tool to use to save somebody a lot of years.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, um. So you've done the personality assessment. Um, I really like all this. How long does all this take, then? How long do you spend doing this with people?
Speaker 2:so something that I sent as sort of pre-work and homework, so they'll do a little bit by themselves.
Speaker 2:But typically in the first session we're focusing on that ideal life and those values and those priorities, like what's where would they like to get to, what's the life goal, life aspirations, what's important. And then I start to get them to think about um, or I'm pop, send them the link to complete the disc assessment and then on session two we start to dive into that and think about these preferences. What are these preferences? What's the environment preferences and the work like, the task preferences, your communication style as well, and also how you like to be managed. That is all that all comes up through the disc as well, and again, I think that's really important to know in advance before you go for a new role, like who are you going to do your best work for? Where are you going to thrive? It's really good to have that information because you can use that then to sort of um, articulate and compose questions to ask in the interview to get a better sense of what is the culture, the environment, what's the management style, this sort of thing.
Speaker 2:So it's all really useful information to have at your disposal absolutely and after that, um, I would again send them away with the link to do this. I use the gallop strengths yeah, I did that one. Yeah, I was introduced to that in my previous role and really liked it. Um, and continue to use it now because I've got had really nice feedback from my clients on it that it's just highlighted strengths I didn't even realize they had and things that perhaps they might have just assumed.
Speaker 2:Everyone did it because it it's something that perhaps comes quite easy and quite naturally to the, to them. They don't necessarily see it as a strength. They think, oh, everyone can surely do that, but it's not true. Yeah, um, so yeah they fill in this.
Speaker 1:What's the importance of knowing your strengths?
Speaker 2:for me this is a big one, um, I feel knowing your strengths. It underpins and actually just just the self-awareness in general, but particularly the strengths underpins a lot of the different steps in a career change process. You know, all the way through from updating your CV, all the way through to you know answering questions like so tell me why you'd be a good fit for this role, through to you know answering questions like so tell me why you'd be a good fit for this role. If you don't know your strengths, if you can't articulate the value of your strengths, so what you bring to the table, your contribution, it's. It's really hard to get that across in an interview.
Speaker 2:It's really hard to get that in writing in your cv or into the cover letter you don't know why you're applying for that role, what you're going to bring to it, how you're going to make it your own. It's, it's. It makes those processes a little bit trickier yeah, I love doing my gallows thing.
Speaker 1:I thought it was really good. I got the book and everything yeah, I've, I.
Speaker 2:It's one of my favorite topics to talk about with my, with my clients, because this is where I see a real shift in their self-esteem, yeah, their self-belief, um, and their confidence and that ability to kind of take a bold step, step out the comfort zone, um. I was with a client yesterday. We were doing her, we were reviewing her strengths and she had, um, a strength was empathy and started to sort of had a conversation around.
Speaker 2:You know what does empathy look like, how is she displaying it in her role? And I was like what are the benefits of you having empathy? And she just sort of looked for a minute and I was like let's think about it. Let's imagine you're talking, you're in, she's in a HR role. Let's imagine you've got someone who's come to you.
Speaker 2:You know you're, they've got a problem, an issue, whatever it may be. They're coming to you and you're displaying, you know you'll be, you're listening, you're understanding where they're coming from. You know you're, you're doing your best to sort of understand it from their point of view as well. How does that make them feel? Well, they'll feel like listened to and seen and valued, like exactly.
Speaker 2:So then what's the benefit from of them feeling seen and valued and listened to? Like what, what, what changes for them if they feel that way? And then you can keep going and you can keep going, you can keep thinking what's the ripple effect, what's the benefit of the benefit of my strength? And this is, like I say, where really my clients start to see the bigger picture. They start to understand their worth, their self-worth and the difference they stand to make and if they are coming to me at a time where perhaps their confidence is low or their self-esteem is low, this is a really great exercise to use to really build that back up and it helps you articulate, I suppose, the value of your strengths on a CV and things like that or in an interview I'll never forget.
Speaker 2:I had a client and she'd gone through an agreements process where she worked and she'd left. Her confidence was rock bottom. She was in a really she was feeling really low. Um, again, she was working in HR. She filled in her strengths finder and we went through her strengths and she had so many great strengths that link to someone working in the HR role and I was like, oh, what did you think of your strengths? Thinking she'd be buzzing about them. She, she's like I thought they were really boring. What, how? Where did you get that from? How do you see that? And I was like no, look. And we went through it and we started sort of aligning her strengths with the role that she ideally wanted to step into. And she could see it and I was like, could you then like sell?
Speaker 2:them yeah, promote yourself and articulate if you think you're, what you've got is really dull and it. Yeah, I'm pleased to say we changed her perspective.
Speaker 1:Yeah because I guess your strengths I don't think any of them are boring. They're just your strengths, aren't they? It's like your value. You can't really say whether they're boring or not, they're just, they're just.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you need even two people can have the same strength, can use them in very different ways, yeah, and they work together as well. So you're quite often I'll find, when I'm going through strengths of people and the strengths finder gives you your top five, you can quite often see a link between all of them, like maybe two of them go really well hand in hand and another two go quite well together and there might be another one. That kind of it's almost a bit like a golden thread that weaves through them all and they tie in really nicely with the disc profile as well. So it starts to put this really nice picture of this individual and how they are unique.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And that's what you want to sell in an interview is your uniqueness, yeah, your unique abilities.
Speaker 1:So you've done all these exercises, you know. You know, I guess, what life you want. You've manifested that, you've daydreamed that. You know, hopefully, what your values, priorities are personality now you know your strengths. What's next, then? How, then, do you tie all this up then into a job search?
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, I like to include one more. I do like to get people thinking about their interests and passions. Yeah, um, so, thinking about you know what topics do or challenges do you naturally gravitate towards if no one's asking so what's the are you interested in? You know what activities perhaps make you lose track of time because you're so engrossed or engaged in it. Um, what do you use? What skills do you use for fun? You know, perhaps outside of work, that could be valuable in a career, and these sorts of questions, uh, particularly with my clients who know they want to change but they don't know what it is, I think it's really nice to explore this. What else could be going? What else could you do? What else really excites you and interests you?
Speaker 2:yeah in work or out of work. So that's another area I like to to look at, and then another, uh, two other areas I tend to focus on with my clients, really, um, and one is knowing why you're moving on. I think that's really important to ensure you don't have deja vu. You know you don't have history repeating itself somewhere else. Get really clear on what else. What is the reason you're going? What's driving that desire to leave? You know, is it lack of growth? Is it misalignment with the company? You know challenges with your manager or co-worker? You know lack of development or is it something else? Um, and what does that fulfilling step next step look like for you?
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:What more off? What do you want to avoid? So that's another thing we really have to get clear on before we start looking at the next role, as well as the career wish list. You know what. What does meaningful work look like to you? What activities, what would be the nice to haves in the role versus what is the non-negotiables in your next role? What's the work you can't not do? Thinking about that? For me, it'd be working with other people and helping other people. Um, when I look back on my career, that's what all my roles, I think, have got in common is some sort of advising, talking to people, building relationships, and I don't think I could do a job where I wasn't engaging with people and speaking to them, with them yeah, it's really good I could see how useful all this stuff is doing I can for anybody at any stage in their career.
Speaker 1:just is that I think this is where so many people just skip this, yeah, um, all stages of their career, but I think this is why so many people end up in jobs they hate. Yeah, there's not any of this.
Speaker 2:The lady I'm working with, one of the ladies I'm working with at the moment, this is her. She said you know, I'm happy in my role. I just she's an action taker. We did our strengths yesterday as I was mentioning number one action taker. So she's unhappy in her role. She takes action, will just, yeah, update that cv, start looking, and she'll move on. And she's saying now she's realizing because I've done that a few times, I've moved on. I'm thinking, yep, this is, I've got it right this time. This job sounds perfect. And then three weeks, two months, in, whatever it may be, she's no and she's. That's happened a couple of times now. I've jumped in thinking I'm making the right choice and it's just not hitting the nail on the head that something is missing, something is not quite right. So she has taken this time to pause, now reflect and let's find out what is that thing that's missing.
Speaker 1:I know you do careers, but you could translate this into all sorts, couldn't? You like relationships, and you know you could really like use this to like find a life partner as well. It's a lot this all translates to, doesn't it? And I guess you'd want to find somebody that's values aligned with yours and absolutely, because characters are similar to yours.
Speaker 2:You know, your life goals are similar yeah, the ideal life isn't completely misaligned. Yeah, you've got similar hobbies and interests, similar passions. You know you want to spend your free time in a similar way. Perhaps.
Speaker 1:Yeah. Yeah it is so relevant so relevant, I think, for whole life. You know, it's just that holistic thing, isn't it? It's for everything really.
Speaker 2:Yeah, understanding yourself really can open doors, yeah, and make decisions so much easier, particularly if you're someone listening, who's a little bit like myself, who does have a tendency to overthink things. When you know this information about yourself, you can kind of stop that from happening yeah you've started to think about what it is you want.
Speaker 2:You know what you're good at, you know what you care about, you know what's important. You know, uh, you can then start to make the decisions, you that are going to steer you in the direction you want to go yeah um, a lot easier than without the, without maybe falling into that overthinking spiral which yeah, which leads to inaction.
Speaker 1:Which does lead to inaction yeah, so it can help make the decisions quicker and help keep that momentum going.
Speaker 2:If you're, you've already done this homework on yourself, this research on yourself. So how long does this all typically take then? How many sessions does this so?
Speaker 1:the first two sessions if you've already done this homework on yourself, this research on yourself. How long does this all typically take then? How many sessions?
Speaker 2:does this take? So the first few sessions I do with a client are very much focused on getting to know themselves personally. So it's the ideal life and it's the values and it's the priorities and it's the personality. And then sessions three and four are much more focused on getting to know yourself professionally and that's when I would dive into the strengths and the value of those strengths and getting my client really clear on those and then starting to think about their career story.
Speaker 2:And this is where we start to think about okay, yeah, I'm good at taking action or I'm good at organizing, but do I enjoy using that strength? Because you can be good at something but not necessarily enjoy using it. And that's another important piece to focus on, like which strengths do I actually want to be using? Which ones do I want to strengthen further? And also thinking about the skills you've acquired along the way. You know the, the skills that you've developed through practice and repetition. Which ones do I want to still keep keep using, which ones you know I don't want to let go off, and which new skills do I want to acquire? What would I love to learn?
Speaker 2:Those are conversations that we have in those, in those sessions, and then sessions five and six are much more about right. Let's start to make a decision, let's start to make sense of everything that we've gathered, start thinking about that career wish list. Let's look for the themes, the patterns, you know what's coming up, and look for careers that align. And it's that when you start to think about who do I know in my network that could help me, how do I make it happen? How do I make it happen? And start, you know, forging that plan, um, to take you from A to B.
Speaker 1:I love that. How can people work with you then, laura? What's the best way for them to contact you?
Speaker 2:the best way to contact me at the moment is on LinkedIn. I'm on there, laura Nesbitt Coach. I'm also on Instagram Same handle, laura Nesbitt Coach, but LinkedIn I'm on. I'd say I'm on a lot more.
Speaker 1:Lovely. And I know you've got a lead magnet, haven't you? So when the episode's released, we'll also share the lead magnet as well. What's the lead magnet?
Speaker 2:um, yeah, I've created something that aligns with this podcast episode, so it's all around sort of imagining um that, clarifying for yourself that ideal life. So just 10 questions designed for someone to work through at their own pace, to really get them reflecting at a deeper level on the life they want to lead. You know, what does a life well lived look like for them? And again, I think it's so easy to think, oh, I should want this, or I should want that, or, and compare what other people are doing but this. The questions are very much designed to get them thinking but what do you want? What is the? What are the voices in your head saying yeah?
Speaker 1:and to listen to them well, that sounds like a really good resource, so, um, we will definitely share that in the show notes but, thank you so much, laura, for joining me today.
Speaker 1:I think what you do is amazing. I think it's like such a good investment, I think, for you and actually for anybody else you know. You know that is maybe, like you know, at a bit of a crossroads or that transition. So I think everybody should be investing in what you offer. So thank you so so much for joining me thank you so much, liz, for inviting me on.
Speaker 1:It's been great fun, thank you thank you for listening to another episode of the Work it Like A Mum podcast. If you enjoyed this episode, please rate, review and subscribe, and don't forget to share the link with a friend. If you're on LinkedIn, please send me a connection request at Elizabeth Willett and let me know your thoughts on this week's episode. You can also follow my recruitment site Investing in Women on LinkedIn, facebook and Instagram. Until next time, keep on chasing your biggest dreams.